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4
An upper class city having this happening
Then attack Eminem cause I rap this way
But I'm glad cause they feed me the fuel
That I need for the fire to burn and it's burnin' and I have returned
Chorus
I'm so sick and tired of being admired
That I wish that I would just die or get fired
And drop from my label and stop with the fables
I'm not gonna be able to top what my name is
And pigeon holdin' to some poppy sensations
They cop me rotation at Rock 'N' Roll stations
And I just do not have the patience
To deal with this cocky Caucasians
Who think I'm some wigga who just tries to be black
Cause I talk with an accent and grab on my balls
So they always keep asking the same fucking questions
What school did I go to?
What hood I grew up in?
The why? The who, what?
When and where and the how?
Till I'm grabbing my hair and I'm tearing it out
You've been driving me crazy, I can't take it
I'm racing, I'm pacing, I stand and I sit
And I'm thankful for every fan that I get
But I can't take a shit in the bathroom
Without someone standing by it
No I won't sign your autograph
You can call me an asshole
I'm glad cause
Chorus
The Real Slim Shady
(The Marshall Mathers, 2000)
May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
I repeat will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here
Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door
And started whoopin her ass worse than before
They first were divorce throwin her over furniture (ahh)
It's the return of the . "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding
He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
And Dr. Dre said . nothing you idiots!
Dr. Dre's dead he's locked in my basement! (ha-ha)
Feminist women love Eminem (chigga chigga chigga)
"Slim Shady I'm sick of him
Look at him, walkin around grabbin his you-know-what
Flippin the you-know-who" "Yeah, but he's so cute though!"
Yeah I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse than what's goin on in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
But it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
And if I'm lucky you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Of course they gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They got the Discovery Channel don't they?
"We ain't nothing but mammals" Well, some of us cannibals
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel I got the antidote
Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes
Chorus:
I'm Slim Shady, yes I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?
Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell his records
Well I do so fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
"But Slim what if you win wouldn't it be weird?"
Why? So you guys could just lie to get me here?
So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears?
Shit Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
You little bitch put me on blast on MTV
"Yeah he's cute but I think he's married to Kim (hee-hee)"
I should download her audio on MP3
And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD (ahhh)
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me
So I have been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me
Who dress like me, walk talk and act like me
And just might be the next best thing but not quite me!
Chorus
I'm like a head trip to listen to cause I'm only givin you
Things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it
In front of y'all and I don't gotta be false or sugarcoated at all
I just get on the mice and spit it
And whether you like to admit it I just shit it
Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
Then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like valiums
It's funny cause at the rate I'm goin when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person in the nursin home flirting
Pinchin nurses asses when I'm jackin off with Jergens
And I'm jerkin but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
And every single person is a Slim Shady lurkin
He could be workin at Burger King spittin on your onion rings
Or in the parkin lot, circling
Screaming "I don't give a fuck!"
With his windows down and his system up
So, will the real Shady please stand up?
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
And one more time, loud as you can how does it go?
Chorus